Focus On Vocabulary And Language Sexual Motivation And The

focus on vocabulary and language sexual motivation and the need to belong the physiology of sex the hormonal fuel is essential, but

focus on vocabulary and language
Sexual Motivation and the Need to Belong
The Physiology of Sex
The hormonal fuel is essential, but so are the psychological stimuli
that turn on the engine, keep it running, and shift it into high gear.
Here, Myers makes an analogy be­tween sex hormones and the fuel that
propels a car. We need the hormones to be sexually motivated, just as
a car needs fuel to operate. In humans, however, there is a two-way
interaction between the chem­icals and sexuality. In addition to
hormones, psychological factors are needed to initiate sexual desire
(turn on the engine) and produce the associated behaviors (shift it
into high gear).
The Psychology of Sex
Viewing X-rated sex films similarly tends to diminish people’s
satisfaction with their own sexual partner (Zillmann, 1989). All films
are rated by a censor and those with an X-rating because of their
sexually explicit content are restricted to adults only. There is much
debate over the influence of such films on people, and some research
suggests that there may be adverse effects. For example, they may
create the false impression that females enjoy rape; they may increase
men’s willingness to hurt women; they tend to lead both men and women
to devalue their partners and their relationships; and they may reduce
people’s feeling of fulfillment with their sexual partners.
Adolescent Sexuality
In recent history, the pendulum of sexual values has swung from the
European eroticism of the early 1800s to the conservative Victorian
era of the late 1800s, from the libertine flapper era of the 1920s to
the family values period of the 1950s. The pendulum of a mechanical
clock swings back and forth from one side, or extreme, to the other.
Myers is pointing out that, during different periods of time (eras),
our views of sexuality tend to move from restrictive (conservative
Victorian) at one extreme to those with fewer restraints (libertine
flapper) at the other. Today’s generation may be moving toward an era
in which commitment and restraint are more important than sexual
expression. (Note that a flapper was an emancipated young woman in the
1920s.)
Sexual Orientation
. . . shunned or fired . . . To be fired means to lose your job (or to
be laid off, let go, or sacked). Myers suggests that one way for
heterosexual people to understand how a homosexual feels in a
predominantly heterosexual society is to imagine what it would be like
if the situation were reversed and homosexuality was the norm. How
would it feel as a heterosexual to be ignored and rejected (shunned or
ostracized), to lose one’s job (be fired), or to be confronted by
media that showed or indicated homo­sexuality as the societal norm?
Most of today’s psychologists therefore view sexual orientation as
neither willfully chosen nor willfully changed. Myers compares sexual
orientation to handedness. You don’t deliberately decide (willfully
choose) to be right-handed or left-handed. Similarly, you can’t
intentionally alter (willfully change) your inherent inclination to
use one hand over the other. Like handedness, sexual orientation is
not linked to criminality nor is it associated with personality or
psychological disorder.
The consistency of the brain, genetic, and prenatal findings has swung
the pendulum toward a biological explanation of sexual orientation
(Rahman & Wilson, 2003; Rahman et al., 2008). The de­bate over what
causes different sexual orientations has continued for many years.
Recent evidence from the research seems to favor (has swung the
pendulum toward) a biologically based account.
To gay and lesbian activists, the new biological research is a
double-edged sword (Diamond, 1993; Roan, 2010). The research
supporting a physiological explanation of sexual orientation has both
positive and negative aspects (it is a double-edged sword). On the one
hand, if sexual orientation is genetically influenced, there is a
basis for claiming equal civil rights and there is no need to
attribute blame. On the other hand, these findings create a nagging
anxiety (a troubling possibility) that sexual orientation may be
controlled through genetic engineering or fetal abortions.
The Need to Belong
Wanting to Belong
The need to belong colors our thoughts and emotions. As humans, we
have a desire to be connected to others and to develop close,
long-lasting relationships. This need to belong affects the way we
think and feel (colors our thoughts and emotions). Most people say
that close, satisfying relationships with family, friends, or romantic
partners makes their lives happy and meaningful (happiness hits close
to home).
Sustaining Relationships
For most of us, familiarity breeds liking, not contempt. “Familiarity
breeds contempt” is an old saying that suggests that gaining intimate
knowledge (familiarity) about others leads to disdain, dislike, or
scorn (contempt) for them. Myers points out that the opposite seems to
be true. The more we get to know people the more likely it is that we
will form attachments and resist breaking these social ties.
The Pain of Ostracism
Being shunned—given the cold shoulder or the silent treatment, with
others’ eyes avoiding yours—threatens one’s need to belong (Williams &
Zadro, 2001). For both adults and children, to be ignored (shunned),
treated with disdain (given the cold shoulder), or deprived of verbal
interaction with others (given the silent treatment) is very
distressing and hurtful. This type of social ostracism makes us feel
isolated and abandoned (threatens our need to belong) and can lead to
depression and withdrawal.